fiance in the waiting room

The younger men ask, mostly, because they hope to get lucky, even from a hospital stretcher.


Girl, I don't see no ring on that finger. You on lock down or still up for grabs? 


Old men are more skillful.  Courtlier.


Thank you, Sugar. You take care of your husband this good? If I was 40 years younger, he'd better watch out cause, let me tell you, I'd snatch you right up.


(Well let me tell you, Mr. Jones... if I was 40 years older...)


Young women ask to even the playing field, to see how we stack up against each other.  I tell them to take off their clothes and hold their babies while they go pee in a cup. I ask them about their menstrual cycles, their sexual habits, their bowel movements.  They want a turn at asking the questions.


You got kids? No?! Hmm. Well, you got a fiance, right?


Usually I don't mind.  An honest question deserves an honest answer and I've got nothing to hide or be ashamed of.  Their questions have very little to do with me. It's much more about them, the holes and the missing pieces in their lives.


My patient tonight was in her 70's.  She drove herself to the hospital when her heart started to hurt. I helped her unbutton her blouse, tied the strings of her hospital gown, brought her ice, called her sister, and tucked more blankets around her while she waited for the doctor.


You sure do work hard, Sweetheart.  What time you get off? 11 pm?!  Is your husband keeping dinner warm for you, I hope?


I'd like to think that if I had a husband, he'd be the kind who would keep dinner warm. But no, I'm not married. 


You're not married? Why on Earth is a sweet girl like you not married?


I read once that in a courtroom, an attorney should never ask a witness a question unless he already knows the answer or truly wants to know the answer.  In the courtroom of my own mind, where I am prosecutor, defendant, witness, jury, and judge, this is a question that no one ever asks or answers.

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Can you go get my fiance out the waiting room?


Sure. What's her name?


Sheila.


What's Sheila's last name?


I don't know?


What do you mean you don't know? I though Sheila is your fiance.


She is. But I just met her on the bus the other day.